Onward Bound

2008-08-17T10:57:00.003-05:00

It's been a great ride over here at Onward Bound, but it's time for a change. I hope you'll join us at our new home! Onward and upward.....

Dear me,

2008-08-13T20:21:00.004-05:00

One of my new favorite bloggers just inspired me to a little creative writing meets therapy project.

It sounded like fun, but like any good plagiarised idea, I thought it needed to be Stephanieized. The concept (for those too lazy to link away) is to write a letter to yourself at age 18. In honor of my upcoming 31st birthday, I thought it would be more appropriate to write a letter to myself at age 21. After all, it's been a busy decade. Little 21-year-old Stephanie has come a long way.

We have a lot of ground to cover, so let's go...

Dear Steph,

You are 21 and beautiful, so why do you insist on dressing like a 40 year-old soccer mom? I know you went to Europe and the little silk scarves around the neck were all the rage, but that look just doesn't translate well in the U.S. of A. Also, no one should be allowed to wear Laura Ashley clothing after 12 and before 40.

Pay attention to Shannon at school. I know you barely know her and you only really know your parents were friends, but you won't believe how close you guys will be. She'll even be your maid of honor in your wedding (we'll get there). Why not get started on your friendship sooner rather than later?

Don't date the Norwegian guy in D.C. during your internship next summer; it's a waste of time. Just focus on your writing and have fun living in the city. Speaking of that, try to give your editing class next spring more than your usual 10 minute attention span. There are important things you need to learn such as A.P. Style. It seems lame, but it will haunt you.

Do date the intern at the first paper you work at. He's hot and he'll break your heart, but you are going to need that experience in your life. Just go with your heart and enjoy it.

When you are dating him, if you go to Virginia for a weekend and it happens to snow that weekend and you have to stay over on Sunday night, it would behoove you to go straight to work when you get back in town and not stop for lunch with your roommate. You guys will have plenty of fun adventures together, you don't need to piss off your editor by being even later that day.

Anyone named Stephanie is a good egg. They make good roommates. Be forgiving when she's too drunk to console you when the intern breaks up with you. She'll be there in plenty of ways in years to come. You may want to remind her that tents go outside, not inside.

I know your first job will be stressful and all, but if there is any way you could not smoke, that would be really great. It would also keep you from lighting your hair on fire with a match when you are on deadline. No one likes the smell of burnt hair in the newsroom.

Speaking of smoking, if you don't smoke, you can possibly avoid meeting your future ex-husband. But I'm not sure I want to prevent that from happening. Just know whatever happens in the end, you're going to be okay. You guys are going to have a great time together and share lots of love. But put your foot down early about that word. You deserve better. Also, your instincts to not want children with him are right on. Birth. Control. Please.

When it comes to your career, the main thing I want to tell you is that the grass isn't greener on the other side. But you are going to need to learn some of that on your own. Set goals and meet them.

Don't be so snobby about the sales side of the newsroom. You aren't any better than them just because you are a starving journalist. And the same goes for public relations people who call you. Be nice.

When you run the marathon and you start puking, just keep going. You'll live.

Harry Potter books are actually really good.

Sephora is just a bad habit and it will suck your money.

Stay away from cowboys in bars.

The night before you go to London, don't let Sarah bring you that last glass of wine. It ends badly for you.

Don't ever run after you've eaten shell fish. You get hives.

And here is the most important thing -- every day over the next decade, even when you are at rock bottom, just take one minute to be thankful. Because you have a stinking awesome life.

Always,

Stephanie

Running

2008-08-11T07:16:00.003-05:00

Holy cow. A post about running on a "running blog." Now that's something you don't read every day.

I hurt.

Yesterday after sunning by the pool for two hours, with apparently sporadically placed SPF 30 Advanced Protection Against Aging, I decided I needed to go for a run. I've been toying with occasionally increasing the distance of my 2-3 mile runs (usually on the 2 side.) So somewhere between 3 and 4 miles, I decided that I had another mile in me. It was probably because I was still a mile away from home, but that was just poor planning.

I'll admit, there was some walking, and a water stop or two. All in all, I was pretty proud of myself (and Gertie) for hanging in there. Maybe I'll do it again next weekend. But no promises.

Several hours later, I realized I am sunburned in all sorts of random places.

Buffy

2008-08-07T07:59:00.004-05:00

On a very rare occasion, I run across something that makes me proud to be a Buffalo alumna.

Whether it's learning that a former classmate is practicing as an openly gay minister, or reading the current professional work of a former Stampede reporter, these things make my inner Buffy shine.

But this -- written by a former classmate (and communications major to boot!)--takes this cake.

Well done. I'm jealous.

Ding Dong. Is Gertie home?

2008-08-06T17:15:00.001-05:00

I learned something about Gertie today.

She gets on the couch when I'm not home.

Oh wait. I knew that.

It turns out, Gertie has had company over.

And she didn't' tell me?

Today when I went home at lunch to let her out (yes, she was on the couch), I ran into the maintenance man. Actually, Gertie got to him first as she was about half a flight ahead of me up the stairs. She seemed to know him, but she seems to know everyone. Apparently he knows her though. And so does his daughter. He told me he had been over several times to fix things or check on leaks with his daughter (maybe 6 or 7 years old?) and she just loves Gertie.

This doesn't surprise me because I think she's pretty lovable. It just makes me laugh to imagine Gertie having people drop by when I'm not home. Does she offer them a drink? Give them a tour? Show them her toys? Most likely, she rolls on her back for a belly rub.

Oh, and it's a good thing I trust my apartment complex staff.

Impulse buying

2008-08-03T11:04:00.003-05:00

So why was I so embarrassed when I had to pay a visit to my local hardware store to buy a toilet plunger yesterday?

It happens.

Toilets get clogged.

Girls clog toilets too.

I know this.

Then why did I almost choke when the helpful store clerk asked me if I was looking for anything specific?

Um, not at all, I'm just going to wander around and see if anything grabs my attention. You know, impulse buying....Oh hey, whadaya know? A toilet plunger. Now that might come in handy. Fun! I've always wanted one anyway.

And then I bought some candy (impulse buying) and a nice little herb garden for my porch (impulse buying.... HEY question: does anyone know if herbs die in extreme heat? I certainly don't want to kill these herbs...) Oh, and it was hot so I needed some water. A regular old nice trip to the hardware store on a Saturday.

Side note: one year, my parents got by little brother a small toilet plunger as part of a plumbers toy kit for Christmas. The child ran around with that thing for months, making it almost cool to be seen sporting a plunger. That is, until my mom caught him actually playing with it in the toilet. Then he wasn't allowed to play with it anymore.

stick it to me, baby

2008-07-31T15:45:00.002-05:00

I just fashioned a piece of tape into a tape bubble and stuck it on my forehead. Maybe genius thoughts will accidentally get stuck on the tape bubble and find their way into my brain. Because that's the kind of week I'm having.

Do any runners still read this blog?

2008-07-29T20:31:00.002-05:00

Hello 'ello 'ello 'llo 'llo 'llo 'o 'o 'o....

I know this blog has taken a bit of a diversion from running, but if there are any readers who are runners with Garmin trainers, I have a question for you. I do still run, by the way. Almost more now that I have Gertie in the city. I just don't talk about it much. Well, because I've had more interesting things to talk about lately....

Anywho, I'm thinking about getting a Mac Book and want to know if anyone has encountered any compatibility problems with Garmins and Macs. I'd love to hear from you --- the good, bad and the ugly. Many thanks in advance!

Here Kitty, Kitty

2008-07-29T07:00:00.000-05:00

The boyfriend has a cat. Well, technically his roommate has a cat, but for all intensive purposes, there is a cat at the boyfriend's house. And this has been a little unnerving to Gertie (read: Gertie's Mom who is terrified that Gertie might be even less of a vegetarian than she is.) who has never really met a cat. At least not long enough to decipher how she feels about cats. For the past month, (whee! It's been over a month!!! Look at me in the big relationship!) we've kept Gertie confined to a certain proximity of space when I've been over. She's been able to see Kitty, but always at a distance. The two have co-existed with Kitty slinking by to take a look at this dog skidding around his living room hardwood floors, licking his owner and others, flopping on people's laps and in general being the lovable spaz that she is. (That's right, Justin. I said love able spaz!)

But last night, we made a huge step for all dog kind. Gertie met Kitty nose to nose. I actually didn't know it was happening or I would have probably set up an intervention. But the boyfriend, who was in the kitchen at the time, apparently thought it was as good a time as any to let them meet. Imagine my surprise when I walked in and saw Gertie less than a foot away from Kitty.

And Kitty was still alive.

And Gertie was, well, more interested in the food that boyfriend had going on than the Kitty treat sitting in front of her.

Later on, in the living room, Kitty stopped by to flop on the floor near Gertie, who didn't seem to mind the company.

Maybe we can just all get along.

100 Things About Me (Part II)

2008-07-28T17:15:00.001-05:00

I know you've been waiting on pins and needles for me to finish this.

The wait stops here.

51. I am a Klutz (capitalization intentional)

52. I don't bake

53. I don't recycle as much as I should.

54. I make wish lists for things I want to buy but can't afford. These lists live in my dayplanner.

55. I sleep walk.

56. My parents used to put a gate up to prevent this.

57. My friend Dawn improvised with an ironing board once.

58. When referring to my friends, I often claim ownership "my friend Dawn," "my friend Jenny" and so on... I don't know why I do this, but I do.

59. In seventh grade, I laughed so hard I peed my pants in the middle of cooking class. Unfortunately, I had a (non-related) detention that afternoon, which made for a very long day.

60. I saved every note written in seventh grade; they are still folded up into little triangles.

61. I love to be the passenger.

62. Spontaneous trips are heavenly.

63. As long as I have ample time to fret about what to pack.

64. I heart my job.

65. I refer to my parents by their first names when talking about them.

66. Hi Terry.

67. When I see a cute dog, I have a tendency to gush and sometimes shriek a little. In general, I refer to dogs as "boogies."

68. I sometimes need to use my inside voice.

69. But I prefer my outside voice.

70. I was never popuuuuular.

71. But I love the song.

72. I do not. Repeat. Do not. Do scary movies.

73. If a move becomes at all terrifying, a pillow is required to hide behind.

74. I love happy hour.

75. Who doesn't?

76. When picking out a book, I read the back cover or inside flap and then at least the first page. I know pretty much right away if a book is going to carry my attention.

77. When I concentrate, I chew the side of my tongue. It looks really stupid.

78. I wear skirts more than pants.

79. Every winter I pray that tall boots and skirts won't be out of style.

80. Eventually this will happen and I will be that lady stuck in the fashion dead zone.

81. Speaking of winter, I hate to drive in the snow and/or ice.

82. Considering my summer driving record, it is probably best that I avoid winter driving all together.

83. I let Gertie kiss me on the mouth.

84. Aside from the ceramic flat iron, I think on demand and DVR technology are two of the greatest inventions of my adult years.

85. I text my hairstylist.

86. I'm not opposed to online dating.

87. When I worked in commercial radio I had my own news jingle.

88. I love striking up conversations with complete strangers.

89. I'm really looking forward to completing this list.

90. Maybe there aren't really 100 things about me to share?

91. Nah, that can't be true. I never shut up.

92. I'll think of 100 more after this list is published.

93. Some unfortunate soul will have to hear me talk about myself later.

94. I have my ears pierced and my belly, but I really want to pierce my nose.

95. When I was a baby, they wrapped me in foil to keep me warm. I looked like a baked potato.

96. No wonder I have to work next to a space heater all day. They set me up to be cold my entire life.

97. My passport expires this year. I should do something about that.

98. I once lost my passport in the Frankfort, Germany airport.

99. I actually have the worst travel luck ever.

100. My initials spell SAM. I tried to get friends to use this as a nickname, but it never stuck. Just goes to show you, you can't force your own nickname.

Don't read this while drinking anything that could go out your nose

2008-07-28T15:14:00.001-05:00

This is awesome.

Is it bad that I want Chipotle now?

me time

2008-07-27T11:36:00.002-05:00

I love it. My own agenda. My own rules. My own destiny. Last night I took myself out for dinner. Crisp greens tossed in a tangy balsamic vinaigrette with bites of salty kalamata olives, crunchy bread with buttery, nutty olive oil and creamy pureed eggplant, sun dried tomatoes and fresh basil nestled within the crevices of homemade farfalle. A perfect espresso to finish it off. Heavenly.

Swell

2008-07-26T12:47:00.002-05:00

Watch it.

Oh to be young again...

2008-07-25T12:30:00.000-05:00

Deep down in the archives of my hotmail (*gasp!*) account, I found an e-mail I sent to my girlfriends - the SB's-during that surreal week in my life between graduation and my first job.

Backstory: I landed my first job as a reporter in Rocky Mount, NC. I knew no one, but it seemed like the great adventure. My mom and I went down for a week to find a place for me to live, but we stayed in Raleigh, because well, it was Rocky Mount. I mean, it was fine for me to live in, but Mom wanted to stay somewhere with restaurants and shopping. I can't blame her, she lived in London at the time and well, Rocky Mount, while uniquely charming, isn't exactly a stateside destination spot for ex-pats. Anywho, this e-mail accuratley captures my life back then (bad spelling and grammar included. Yes, I was a reporter, but it wasn't for my attention to detail -- more my ability to connect with people and tell their story.) And while life seemed so complicated at the time, it was really quite carefree. Ah, to be young...

Dear girls,
Hello to all of you. I'm still alive and am in Raleigh at the Embassy Suites Hotel by the Crabtree Mall. No luck finding an apartment but I am considering renting out a room here since it is so nice and all. Free coctails from 5-8. I can see me now..."Sorry boss, I'd love to stay and finish this story, but I have a free amaretto sour waiting for me in my hotel lobby.") And it WOULD be awfully nice to not have to worry about making my bed and washing my towels every day. hmmmmm...

In the real world, I found a cute little house today that I am dreaming of renting and fixing up. Sarah, it is near Chicos and that part of town. It is 475 a month, but that is reasonably cheap considering I've seen one bedroom apartments for 550. It has two bedrooms and a living and dining room plus a fenced in yard for Katie. [Katie was my dog at the time] My mom isn't sure. Its not the cost but just the worry of me being in a house with all the responsibilities of a house. Plus they'd have to buy me a fridge and a washer/dryer. Its really old, but really cute. It has white walls and dark hardwood floors. No apartments yet. They are either trashy or too expensive. [It's, Stephanie, it's. No wonder you drove your first boss crazy!]

I cried today in front of my boss. Yup. This is the girl who can make it through graduation and saying good-bye to her best friends without a tear or even a wimper, but put her in front of a telephone,a conference table, people telling her she can't rent, and her boss and she goes hysterical. I was mortified, but I couldn't help it. I just cried. Then once I started crying about that, I started thinking of everything I had lost and how lonely I was.

Write soon so next time I come down to the public access computers at the hotel I have something to read after a [crappy] day like today. :)

Much love!
Stephanie
Natalya, if you read this, I love you and hope you are having fun in Russia.
Sarah, I haven't had a [crap] in four days.
Nat, I wrote you seperate.
Shannon, I went shopping last night with my mom and got a shirt at abercrombie. I wish you could borrow it.

Things that make me go grrr

2008-07-24T13:40:00.003-05:00

People make me crazy sometimes. Particularly in their cars. Particularly at gas stations. I mean, clearly, I have my own issues but I like to think my gas station manners are up to par.

Consider the following:

Quick Trip 12:30 p.m. in the 816 where gas prices dip a little lower in this town.

More cars than pumps.

Cars line up behind cars, while others lurk further out, completely blocking the flow of traffic.

At pump no. 10, I see a woman sitting in her car. I zip in to wait behind her. Then I realize, she's not "plugged into" the pump. There is a total on her payment screen so I assume she's already filled up and is waiting for her passenger.

No problem.

I'll wait.

I mean it'd be nice if she would pull up to the parking spots and wait, but maybe it will just be a second.

De de de...

Finally passenger returns, yacking on her cell phone, carrying misc. treats and beverages. She then goes around to the driver's side (is she handing over the food before she gets in?) and driver gets out and passenger gets in driver's seat.

Maybe it's a slow-motion Chinese fire drill with QT snacks involved?

The driver then leaves the car area entirely to go into the store.

By this time, I'm already assessing my options for other pumps because tick-tock people! But really? Really?

Out of my rear view mirror (because I have now moved, but am watching this scene unfold from another pump waiting zone) I see the new driver (former passenger) waiting for her friend. More cars have lined up and she just sits there.

Finally, driver #1 returns and passenger returns to passenger's seat (still yacking on her phone, by the way) and driver returns to driver's seat and they speed off.

Madness. Absolute madness.

Cleaning House

2008-07-20T12:02:00.002-05:00

Yesterday I spent the afternoon cleaning out the house I lived in with my ex-husband. It was physically and emotionally grueling. A the end of the day, I felt drained and yet cleansed. It's a task I've avoided since the divorce, but something that needs to be done. Unfortunately, there is a second house that needs to be cleaned out (long story as why there are two houses, but just take my word for it.) and so next weekend will involve more cleaning. Houses are just houses, but it's amazing the energy they take on from the time spent living in them. This house was particularly rough because the end took place there. I felt some of that old energy grip me as I cleaned. So I'm glad it's done.

By the way, I have a computer desk, a bookshelf, printer, lamps, an exercise ball, oil based space heater, two baby gates and some random dishes for any takers. E-mail me...

There was something that my ex-husband left at the house that I needed to get back to him, so I took it to our former best friends' house. The husband of this couple was out in the garage. Suddenly I felt like I had been hit by a tank. And I couldn't' talk. He asked me what was new. The answer "everything" seemed appropriate. I heard myself trying to tell him how happy I am now and that I'm doing really well, but it was out of body. He looked at me with a look of pity and possibly a little judgment and I was wiggling in my skin. I rambled on for a little bit longer, handed him the thing and left, sending greetings to his wife and telling them to call me for a drink if they were in my neighborhood. (I'll be surprised if I hear from them.)

After the awkward delivery, I needed some time with my friends. The friends who have been there for me to help me clean up this entire mess. I called the one friend I know I can always go to.

What are you doing?

Working

Beer in two?

And beer and yummy Mexican food later, I felt the energy from my new life return with a big 'ole virtual bear hug.

There's no place like home

2008-07-17T19:04:00.003-05:00

I had a warm fuzzy moment about my apartment today. Actually I was at work. I keep a picture of my residence on my white board above my computer. (Wow, that's an incredibly dorky admittance.)

I love where I live. Love. Love. Love. Sure, it's tiny. It has linoleum. And no one in their right mind should ever open my microwave. I'm not sure what the last girl had going on in there, but I've never been able to get it quite right. My dishwasher is crap and when it's windy outside there is a wretched noise in my kitchen. But it's my little world of bliss.

That's why I was so surprised when after Gertie and I went on a run today, I couldn't get in my front door. As in, my key wouldn't work. It dawned on me that my front mat was missing, and so was hot neighbor's, but once the management took the mats away to deal with a maintenance problem. I just figured it had happened again. But then I looked up at the number and realized I was at the wrong apartment.

Riding Old School

2008-07-16T17:15:00.001-05:00

I've sorted out the "totalled car" situation and to make a long story short, I'm driving a car, the car, I drove in college and throughout the first part of this decade. It's a little surreal to be back in this particular vehicle, but I'm proud of myself for this decision. This car has been with me for a long time. It's seen me through college, first jobs and been with me in five states. There is something comforting in that.

Beads for the ladies

2008-07-13T12:54:00.004-05:00

My bachelorette party was a small affair. My maid of honor, Shannon and my other Stephanie took me out in Wilmington, N.C. On the whole, it was pretty calm. No naked men, male genitalia cakes, no games etc... I liked it this way. Shannon did bring with her some Mardi Gras style beads. She intended for me to hand them out to young lasses, but apparently I had my own idea of what I should do with these beads. Two bars into our crawl, I became appalled at the amount of young college-aged women grinding up on guys who could care less about the brains attached. These women needed saving. They needed beads. I began distributing the beads, with the advice, "Stay in school, don't trust men and focus on your career." It seemed everyone wanted some beads to wear. Soon, girls were coming to me asking for the beads. Now remember, even though this is a calm affair, I'm still a bachelorette and I'm wearing a veil on my head. Advice+veil did not match.

My friends dubbed me the "Bride Mother Teresa."

And since the marriage didn't work out, I can't exactly wear that title anymore. Out of respect for Mother Teresa's faith, I will not go with "The Divorced Mother Teresa." Making her a bride was bad enough.

But my intentions to save others remain the same, so I'd like to present Stephanie's rules for divorce -- for the ladies in the house. Kindly note, these beads of wisdom are not intended to meet everyone's specific divorce situation. For example, I didn't have children. Take my ramblings with a grain of salt. However, unlike the last time I dispensed beads, I am sober.

The Beads:

First and foremost: Take care of yourself. At this point, your marriage is over. You are not a "we" and you must start to think like a "me."
Find a place to live where you are completely at peace. This is going to be your retreat, your refuge and your new life will start here.
Try, try not to go down negative paths with your ex or his family. You will slip and fall here. You will do and say things you regret, but be strong and use as much self-restraint as you can.
On that same note, DO NOT engage in ANY communication with your ex's new girlfriend. (If you are so lucky to have an ex with a new girlfriend.) Even if she tries to engage in diaglogue with you, be the bigger person and don't, don't, don't lower yourself to that level.
Find your true friends and lean on them. They will rise to the top. They will be the ones who answer the phone at 2 a.m., who bring you tissues and junk food, who allow you to text thoughts intended for your ex, who will celebrate your triumphs and most of all, who won't judge you.
At the same time, find your inner strength and know you can make it on your own. Slowly you can start to wean yourself from the dependence on your ex, your friends and your family and you will find a powerful new you.
Date when you are ready. It's ok to pull the cord on dating if you decide it's not for you, but if you even have an inkling to date again, go with it. It can be a lot of fun. It can also provide some perspective on your situation.
Use retail therapy with caution. A little can be ok.
Take life one day at a time. Time is your enemy and your best friend.
Read anything that makes you feel better. Not every divorce guide book is for you, but find a few that you can glean some nuggets from. It will make you feel better to...
Know you are not alone. E-mail me if ever want to talk.

This is creative

2008-07-13T11:55:00.003-05:00

Last night my fortune cookie told me I would be exceptionally creative today. I have sat here in front of the blogger.com screen trying to figure out how to make this alleged creativity happen.....nada.

So let me just tell you what I've been up to today.

My Sunday Morning
by Stephanie

I tried to sleep in a little. But Gertie was having none of it. So we were up and at 'em. At home, I made some coffee. I was out of cream which was sort of sad, so I overcompensated with gobs of sugar. Earlier, I had picked up the mail and needed to sort out an issue with Time Warner. Of course, I sat on hold for 24 minutes. Gertie was not a fan of the music playing on speaker. While on hold, I took care of some laundry, tidied up a tad and finished off the sugar coffee.

Gertie was nosing the leash and I knew I should run so I changed into running gear and we headed out into the morning sun. Three miles later, we are home and I am blogging about my Sunday morning.

The end.

I stand corrected

2008-07-10T13:32:00.003-05:00

Clearly the cool kids (and super awesome kids) know WAY more about this sort of concert going than I do. Apparently, I needed to cite the artist's name correctly as shown here:
Snoop Dogg.

I apologize to Mr. Dogg and his agents for this grave misrepresentation. (And vice-versa to all the Snoop Dog's out there for the mistaken identity.)

Phone call

2008-07-10T10:51:00.003-05:00

Me: Hello
W: Stephanie, it's Whit (also known as my super awesome friend/personal stylist. Ok, she's not just my stylist. She could be yours too. E-mail me for deets.)
Me: Hey
W: What are you doing tomorrow night?
Me: Um, happy hour with my friend, Dawn and then I dunno.
W: I have a much better plan for you.
Me: Okaaaaaaaaaay
W: 311 and Snoop Dog concert.
Me: Really?
W: Yup
Me: Where?
W: Sandstone. Are you in? (Names list of people also attending.)
W: In background to her boyfriend: It's Steph. I think she's going! She's so cool!
Me: Pause. [Thinking (Why was I thinking? This should have been an easy yes, but I was trying to think if there would be any negative consequences that could result in such concert going. Ok, I won't be driving, the ticket is free, yes, I have to cancel on Dawn, but she'd totally understand, I don't have to work on Friday and the concert is free and it's Snoop Dog. Awesome.)]
Me: I'm in. (duh.)

Sometimes you get more than you expect

2008-07-09T08:39:00.002-05:00

This morning, I stopped at a gas station on my way to work to pick up a caffeinated beverage. I'm in this particular gas station at least once a week. The lady at the counter is a very friendly and very beautiful lady from India. I noticed her beautiful henna art and commented on it. She told me she did it herself and then she pulled out her tube of henna and asked me if I wanted to try it. Well now, this is more than frapppuccino stop! Why not? So now I have a lovely vine with leaves on it extending from my wrist to the tip of my pointer finger. I also have a frappuccino.

Fourth of July Update -- Check, check, check

2008-07-08T00:34:00.004-05:00

So I completed everything I set out to do this past weekend, and I'm pretty happy about that. I'm obviously NOT happy about my totalled car. But here's a recap:

Ice cream came from the boyfriend who brought me a butterscotch milkshake (my favorite!) after my car accident.
Fireworks. Well, I didn't exactly see a "show." But there was enough bang bang bang to last me until next year. And everyone is in one piece too! There was also a little bonus to the fireworks in that I got to rid myself of a few items...
Running- This is what I'm most proud of because after the whole car thing I was a little worried this wouldn't take place. But Saturday and Sunday were rock star running days for me. Thanks for the encouragement, you.
Meet the 'rents.- Not only did I get to meet the boyfriend's super awesome siblings, the meeting of the 'rents went very well.
And because it's summer, summer, summer time, I'm looking forward to a four day week followed by a visit from my super cool cousin from Chi-Town.

my mid-year resolution

2008-07-05T13:51:00.003-05:00

Who says January is the only time we can resolve to start fresh. I'm starting a new trend: Mid-year resolutions. And here is mine:

To have no more encounters with emergency professionals of any kind -- inlcuding but not limited to police officers, EMTs and firemen.

This is out of control.

Yesterday I was in an accident where my car was totalled. Yes, I'm fine and Gertie's fine (she was with me.) But my car? Not so much. After the great crash of 2008, (actually, it's the second crash of 2008 -- I was rear ended in Februrary.) I remembered something I read right after the separation. It's a book called "Crazy Time Surviving Divorce and Building a New Life." It's a great book, but on page two something rings a little extra true with me:

Most people go a little crazy when their marriage cracks....Health Statistics tell you that you are prone to getting sick and having car accidents."

Based on my track record, I should probably consider staying away from cars all together, but unfortunately that's not really an option. So I'm just going to set this little resolution. It's only for the rest of the year. By the time I get to 2009, I plan to have all of this out of my system.

4th of July - will there be ice cream, fireworks and dare I suggest a run or two?

2008-07-03T11:42:00.003-05:00

So three days of summer holiday happiness await me. And I'm super excited because I'm starting the weekend with a happy hour with my friend/personal sage Justin. We need to catch up. Badly.

I'm not terribly patriotic, I'll admit. But the 4th of July evokes a certain nostalgia in me. I want to see fireworks, run through a sprinkler, wiggle and wave sparklers and eat ice cream.

I also need to run. Badly. Gertie and I had two mediocre at best runs this week and I can feel myself slipping out of shape. So I'm going to make at least two runs happen this weekend. Really. I am. I hope.

Also on tap is the big unveiling of the boy to the 'rents. Oh boy. I have decided that we should see Othello. I figure in lieu of a tale of jealousy and murder, any boy has to look pretty good. Actually, I'm not worried. He's pretty cool and I like him. So how can they not?

Have a great loooooooong weekend.

It doesn't get better than this

2008-06-30T11:42:00.002-05:00

I thought my debit card was missing. At first I was really super chill about it because I remembered taking it out of my wallet to run an errand. I changed my mind about that errand and thought I put it back. Later that day when I went to grab some pizza (PIZZA!!! Yum.), I realized it wasn't there. No biggie. I used another card. (Yes, mom, I put a slice of pizza on credit, but I had no other option at that point.) I figured I had just set it down by my purse and not put it back in my wallet.

I calmly returned home and it wasn't there. Ok, well maybe it's in my car. Nope, not in my car. Ok, well, maybe it's in my purse loose. Nope, not in my purse. Well, maybe I dropped it and Gertie picked it up and took it somewhere in the apartment. I looked under the bed, couches, closet, the trash (maybe I threw it away?), the dirty clothes (maybe I wanted to wash it?) --nope, not anywhere in the apartment.

Ok, panic time. Cancelling card. Stat.

This morning, I called to order a new card and make sure nothing strange had posted over the weekend. And literally, as I'm on the phone with the bank representative, I opened up my wallet to tell her my bank account number and out falls my card. It was behind my checkbook.

And it's too late to cancel my cancellation. So now I have no card for 10 business days.

Doh.

Back in time...

2008-06-25T09:14:00.002-05:00

I'm a huge fan of this trilogy. And sometimes, I think about what it would be like to travel back in time and freak yourself out with your future self. (Hi, Dorks McGee, much?)

My past self would probably faint if she knew where life was going to take her. This was an epiphany I reached last night as I was sitting on a couch surrounded by all new friends, completely happy. And I was thinking that if my life hadn't changed so much, I never would be here, never would have met them, never would have experienced this moment of happiness.

Regardless of all the pain and hardship there is a little bit of thrill in the idea that my past self had no idea what was about to transpire in her world. You just never know the curve balls life is going to throw at you. And that's why it's onward bound for me... (And future, future self, please don't come knocking at my door anytime soon because my current life is baffling me enough. I get it. I don't need any previews. I'll roll with it, whatever it is. Past self, you have no idea... but you'll be more than ok.)

wet dog, wet car, wet hair

2008-06-24T11:39:00.003-05:00

This morning there was a downpour. I took Gertie down to do her business, but it was raining so hard, I thought I'd stop by my car first and grab my umbrella.

Bad idea.

Because as soon as I opened up the car door to grab my umbrella, Gertie thought it was time to go for a ride.

And she didn't want to leave the car.

So I'm standing outside the car in the POURING rain, pulling on her leash trying to coax her out of the car while she's having none of it.

Why?

Well of course she's all dry and cozy as a bug while I'm getting DRENCHED! By the time I got her out and my umbrella up, I was soaked. I had to do my hair again and blow dry my clothes.

I love that stupid dog.

Lucky, Hairspray and a little bit of shrieking

2008-06-22T23:06:00.002-05:00

That's how the house guest met his (her?) fate. Thanks to some intense bravery on the part of the Red Head, I no longer have a spider. Also, thanks to the kind folks at TIGI who make some strong holding (and smelling) hairspray. And I'm sure Amanda Peet (cover of June Lucky) never knew she would come in so handy.

Oh and it was me who was shrieking, even though I was about 20 feet away and hiding my face...

The house guest

2008-06-20T16:46:00.004-05:00

So I knew it would happen. It was inevitable. It is one of the rights of passage of a divorce that goes right along with moving out, signing icky legal documents, sleeping in your bed alone etc....

The first spider.

And it's a doozy.

Drying my hair this morning, I look up and see a spider so large I think it has its own shadow. And it's high up toward the ceiling. Great. Maybe it will just wander it's way out the window.

But if not, it could get in my bed....

So this is bad, I think. I'm just going to go to work now... (First stage of grief is denial.)

At lunch, I returned home and it was still there. Larger than life. Mocking me.

I consulted with my mom.

Mom: Well, you just have to kill it. I had to kill some big spiders in England.
Me: Maybe I could call hot neighbor and have him kill it.
Mom: No. That is pathetic. Don't go to that level.
Me: It's not even like that. It is just about the spider.
Mom: Still pathetic.
Me: Fine.

Not the motherly advice I was seeking.

I went around and tried to get some advice from co-workers. One co-worker said, "suck it up."

Well now that was harsh.

No, she meant literally, "suck it up" with the vacuum.

Hmmmm...something to consider.

To be continued....

my mom has a blog!

2008-06-19T17:15:00.001-05:00

Welcome to the blogosphere, Mom!!

This would also be a good time to thank both of my parents for being so supportive.

Dating in the age of Facebook, texting and my blog

2008-06-16T17:30:00.000-05:00

Enter our latest dating contestant -#3. He's young (at least he was born in the 70's.), smart, a self-described nerd, adorable (Can you use that word for a guy? I did. So there), and has the most amazing brown eyes...oh, and he is a red head. Gotta love that. But here's the deal. I'm all new at this. No, obviously, I'm not. But I am.

Here's what I mean. See, the red head is the first guy I've dated that has found my facebook which took him to my blog and allows him to read my tweets. And this is new territory. Because before we had even so much as met face to face, the guy knew so much about me. This begs the question, should I remove the blog from my FB account? This can be debated later.

But with the texting, facebook stalking and googling that now happens pre first date, are we becoming smarter, savvier daters? About two hours into this date, I'm thinking it's like our fifth or something and not because I am bored, uninterested (hardly!) or otherwise. Simply because there was all this research that went into this guy before I even met him. And likewise on his end. So we skipped the get-to-know you small talk and were able to have a much more meaningful experience.

P.S. He so just texted me. eek! I'm such a girl!
P.S.S. I also know he is so reading this blog.
P.S.S.S. So don't hold anything against me. This is, after all, my little world. But I'm glad to have you as a reader for now. Just know that anything you say or do can be documented here at Onward Bound. Oh, and thanks for the amazing date. Even if you totally blew my cover with Hot Neighbor by kissing me good-bye in front of him. Oh well, totally worth it! See you tonight?

Update on the Power Suit

2008-06-13T12:30:00.000-05:00

I felt I needed to update you on the Power Suit. While in Virginia (or was I back in Maryland? Oh well. Doesn't matter.) I stopped post-appointment to fill up my tank.

I was getting out of my rental car and I heard a riiiiip.

Up the back seam.

I don't even know what to say about it.

Awww...

2008-06-12T22:36:00.003-05:00

My dad wanted to invite me to dinner tomorrow, but he wanted to make sure I didn't have a date. Gee Dad, I would have cancelled if you would have just asked. But of course I don't have a date. Why would I have a date? I guess if you count Gertie...

Mr. D stopped by drink celebrations last night. I guess that was a date. It was enough of a date that my friends were cracking up about the fact that I managed to swing a date to my divorce celebrations.

In my fire engine red strappy dress.

dee-vorced

2008-06-10T22:23:00.002-05:00

Divorced.
To better accept this role, I decided to seek the wisdom of my friends at dictionary.com
1.
a judicial declaration dissolving a marriage in whole or in part, esp. one that releases the husband and wife from all matrimonial obligations. Compare judicial separation.

Matrimonial obligations. Wow, what were those? To have and to hold? To cherish and to something. Sad that I don't even remember.

What I do remember is that I loved a man. We had a life. I liked it a lot. We were one. We were best friends. He loved me. We laughed, we cried, we cherished (yay vows!), we argued, we enjoyed one another's company. We planned for the future.

But what I know now: I'm ok being one on my own. (plus dog -- that helps.) I. am. loved. Although not by one man, but by two parents, a brother, a sister, a dog, friends, strangers, my family physician (odd, but true), cousins, aunts, uncles, a grandma, and most importantly by myself.

And I will be ok. This will not own me, define me or destroy me. It will empower me. enrich me and bless me with new beginnings.

But to him I say, good luck, good bye and best wishes. May our marriage have touched a life, made a difference and benefited others.

And to me, I say, cheers. Life is good. God is good. You are going to be just fine.

How is it I am so tired?

2008-06-09T18:25:00.003-05:00

Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I drove from BWI to Alexandria to Richmond to Annapolis to College Park to Hampton, VA and back to BWI over the past weekend.

Stopping Traffic

2008-06-05T21:17:00.002-05:00

I'm in College Park, MD judging a writing contest. Which reminds me of one of the awards I won when I was a reporter in North Carolina. It was from the North Carolina Mental Health Association. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I was the North Carolina Mental Health Association Reporter of the Year in 2001. Please hold your applause.

Consider that little factoid as you read the following (true, sadly) story from yesterday:

I arrived at BWI in good spirits. Rental car line was a little long, but I took it in stride. Had an awesome lunch with a new client and hit the road to head down to Richmond for the night. Cruisin' down I95 in my little rental car (NOT a PT Cruiser this time, thank God!) Looking forward to a 4:30 happy hour with another client. Feeling good. Oh no. Not feeling good. Is that my heart? And come to think of it, wasn't I having a tinge of pain right before lunch? Maybe I just need to get my mind off it. I call my boss. Leave her a voice mail about my fabulous lunch. And now my heart is really hurting and so is my left arm. ohmygodI'mhavingaheartattackatage30! And I might die right here at the wheel and put others in harm's way as I spin out of control on 95.

I pull over.

And call 911.

Because that's what you do when you could be dying.

And then I wait. And I can't breathe and my arm and now the back of my neck are both tingly.

This is not good.

911 man is very calm. He tells me to do the same thing. Help is on the way.

Is it stupid that I called 911, I ask?

No, you did the right thing, he says.

A police officer shows up. His fly is down. I want to tell him, but I'm too busy dying.

In my rear view mirror I see a fire truck, lights, sirens and all careening down 95. Oh god. Is that for me? It is.

The fire truck pulls in behind me and angles itself so that the lane of traffic is blocked. It is followed by an ambulance which pulls in front of me and the cop car.

Five or six? EMT's crawl out and are surrounding my car. Someone is walking me to the ambulance. That someone is incredibly hot and I can't stop looking at him. But don't judge me because I was dying and deserved some last pleasures in life.

And I'm still in great pain. But apparently I'm not dying.

Apparently I'm having a panic attack. I'm told this as I'm sitting on a stretcher, with heart monitors stuck all over me, a blanket draped over my lap with my red work heels poking out.

Apparently you can have them when you are having a perfectly lovely day and not at all stressed.

The EMT's humored me. They see it all the time. Don't be embarrased.

But I stopped traffic.

And then, I got back in my car and drove south toward Richmond. And proceeded to have an amazing evening. What the hell?

Frozen in time

2008-06-03T17:00:00.001-05:00

Because I know you can't get enough of my antics of late, I thought I'd share a story that happened a few weeks ago. (Sorry, but believe it or not, I haven't done anything funny or otherwise interesting in 48 hours.)

SB and I had a date. And during said date, he wanted to visit a very large sportsman's store to buy some work boots. SB is an avid hunter. I used to be a vegetarian. Let's just say that if he wasn't mega hot, I probably wouldn't be on a date to a store featuring various types of animal slaughtering devices. I know, priorities.

So he takes me into a room that can only be described as the "Dead Deer Museum." That's exactly what it was -- taxidermy central. The deer were all posed in a fake natural habitat resembling a Colorado landscape. Some were jumping over fences, others were reaching up to trees, as if to eat and one little guy was even scratching his ear like my dog does. SB was explaining to me that the collection came from one guy in Colorado who made a ton of money selling his hunted to this store. And I'm trying to act interested because clearly the presentation of these animals is very near and dear (har har) to SB's heart. And I want to say something profound. So I say, "Wow, how artistic of him to shoot all these deer doing different things."

SB just kind of looks at me and keeps going. (Later he said he was so confused by the statement because he knows I'm smarter than that so he thought he misheard me. He really thought it was a misunderstanding of taxidermy) So he starts to explain that the taxidermist can recreate the animals doing different things.

Sadly, it wasn't until the next day as I was retelling this tale to a co-worker that I had the epiphany that animals go limp when they are shot. They do not freeze mid-activity.

I'm a smart one.

No Game

2008-06-01T14:43:00.002-05:00

People, you need no longer wonder why such a cute, talented, smart, successful gal such as myself has had to resort to online dating. I prove my lack of game over and over and over again.

Take today. I'm taking the elevator (shut up) and I see Hot Neighbor who starts to say hi as the door is shutting. So awkwardly, I stick my arm out to stop door and of course, elevator door keeps closing, so I literally leap through the door as it is closing on me. Classy.

If that wasn't bad enough, a conversation about summer travel went as following:
Him: Last summer I went to Nantucket. Have you ever been there?
Me: No, but my sister-in-law was married there and I've seen pictures. (Really? My ex-inlaws? I had to go there?)
Him: Oh yah, it's cool.
Me: (Must I continue along this path of destruction, you ask? Oh yes, I must.) And I got married on an island off N.C. I mean, I'm not really married anymore, but the wedding was nice. (And yes, I keep going) It's a great island. No cars. Golf carts only. (UGH!!!!)
Him: Oh yah, there is an island off Michigan like that.

Great subject change...as he is clearly off to the pool...

Him: So have you been to the pool yet?
Me: No, but when I do, I'm sure I'll be doused in sunscreen, sporting the wide-brim hat.
Him: laughing.
Me: (Now gazing at his obviously tan, toned body): It looks like you don't have that problem. (??!!!)
Him: Well, I've logged some pool hours.
Me: (Now just really wanting to end this ordeal.) Well have fun out there!

And back to being a Monk for me.

Silence is Golden...

2008-06-01T00:33:00.002-05:00

There is nothing wrong with being still and quiet. And this weekend has been a great time of reflection.

In the spirit of honesty and full disclosure, Monk Stephanie did attend Gay Pride with Gertie. She also went to see a movie with a friend tonight.

BUT, seriously, there has been a lot of silence, thinking and sorting. And what have I learned?

Good question. I'll need some more time to figure it out.

The Power Suit

2008-05-27T20:51:00.003-05:00

I survived my first holiday weekend solo. Another milestone in this journey. But it wasn't without hardship. I mean, I had a great weekend, don't get me wrong. But at the end of the day, I'm still getting divorced, ending a relationship that I thought would last forever and readjusting to life by myself. And that's sad.

On Monday afternoon, I decided I wanted to see a movie. These are books I poured over as a child. My dad read me the first book when I was 9 and I was hooked. I have no problems doing things alone. So I figured a movie would be no different. I walked to the nearest theater (I love that I can walk there!) I bought my ticket, my popcorn and found my seat. No problem. The movie was great. There are so many levels to this story. (Stop here if you don't want a spoiler.) At the end of the movie, the two oldest siblings are told they won't be returning to Narnia, a place they love and hold dear. Their time in Narnia is over and there is no more they can learn there. They must return home and live their lives. I could draw so many obvious parallels to my life right now. I loved my marriage. Loved him. But now, it's over and I must move on and live my life. So I cried. I told myself I was crying in the movie because I always cry in movies, but something in me knew it was more.

After the movie, I went to the ladies room. And suddenly the weight of the world hit me. Oh my god there is no one waiting for me out in the lobby. I am all alone. The floodgates were released. Which was really bad timing because I knew there was a line.

After I regained my composure, I went out into the beautiful sunshine, in my beautiful city. And then I bought a suit. A black skirt suit that fits amazing. (To my credit, this little bit of retail therapy was part of the plan because I knew I had a business trip next week and I needed a new suit that fit.)

I love wearing suits. They are crisp, classic and powerful. And they are always stylish. But I think I will always see this suit as my ultimate power suit because symbolically, it represents my strength. My ability to rise from the ashes despite it all. So whenever I'm feeling a little bit weak. A little bit like I might not make it, I think I'll put on my suit and remind myself that I can and I will.

100 Things About Me (Part I)

2008-05-26T11:22:00.002-05:00

If I want something bad enough, I will make it happen
I am stubborn
I'd skip dessert, but never cheese.
Every night I take Gertie's bed and drag it into my room by my bed so we can sleep next to each other.
I can't live without coffee.
I want to be a roller derby girl, but I bruise easily and I'm vain.
I will sometimes go see a movie just because I'm craving popcorn.
And I never skip the butter.
I have no poker face. Therefore, I'm an awful liar.
I wear my heart on my sleeve, even when I'm not aware of it.
Lately, memoirs before fiction
In high school, I could have been Mandy Moore's character in Saved!
I like Mandy Moore a lot.
In Jr. High, I ran track, but I came in dead last in every 400 race I ran. One time I got third place, but it was still last and I was so proud of myself.
My first road race was the Trolley Run in Kansas City in 1995.
In college I made all my friends read Bridget Jones' Diary before the book was a hit and way before the movie.
I hosted Morning Edition for an NPR station in Indiana.
I loved working in radio.
I want Terry Gross' job and her radio voice.
Sometimes I wish I went to a college big enough that I wouldn't have to explain to people where it is and how small it is.
I latch onto a song and will overplay it to insane levels.
I am overprotective of Gertie.
I like a firm mattress.
And sheets with high thread count.
I am light sensitive and sleep with a mask.
I have a crown on my front right tooth.
I worry about it popping off at inopportune times.
When is a good time for your tooth to come off?
I like spontaneous road trips.
Especially if there is a lake and a boat involved. If not, shopping and fine dining will do.
But I will not swim in water where snakes have been sighted.
Or alligators. (Florida)
One of my favorite places is the Outer Banks of North Carolina.
I can't dance.
I've tried.
I still try.
When I was a newspaper reporter, I once wrote a lawn & garden story about yard ornaments.
And I went door to door to interview people about their gnomes and flamingos.
Where is my Pulitzer?
I don't like having my toes painted bright colors.
I'd eat seafood everyday if I could.
But if I eat shrimp and run or work out, I break out into hives and end up in the E.R.
If I'm honest, I shouldn't eat shell fish ever. But I do.
I hate my chin.
But I love my nose.
The best compliment I've ever received is that I'm quirky.
I don't think cilantro tastes like soap.
I've never waited tables or bar tended.
Because I know I'd be awful at both.
But my first job was at Baskin Robbins and I made a great ice cream server.

It's all about the journey

2008-05-25T09:30:00.005-05:00

I never thought I'd be here. But now that I am, I can't help but want to write about some of the obsurd happenings in the world of online dating. Thanks for the inspiration to share...

There is no moral to these stories because as my friend Justin likes to say, it is not an instinctive move for us to move to the Internet when looking for a match. If we could find someone in other ways, we would. So therefore, anyone out there in online dating land has some sort of flaw, issue or quirk whether it be minor or major. I'm learning to take it all with a grain of salt and to enjoy the journey...but damn if I don't want to laugh about some of it!!!

So for those (like I was) who have no idea how Match works, here is a synopsis:
You sign up with an account and try to pick a clever name. (No, I'm not sharing mine. It's lame.)
Then you answer questions about your lifestyle, preferences, ideals and how you hope your match will answer the same questions. You write a clever headline (not sharing that either) and finally, you write a few paragraphs of introduction. Slap on a few photos and up you go!

My tactic was post and wait to see what happened. But you could take a more aggressive approach. If you see someone that looks promising, you can either no holds bar and send them a message via your personal Match e-mail account, or you can "wink" at them. Winking is just a way to say, hey I'm interested and maybe you are too.

Mr. Self-Deprecating
My first experience on Match occurred about five minutes after I signed up. I was sitting there, watching TV and suddenly I saw I had an instant message. (This is another way you can use Match.) So I start to talk to this guy. I could tell I wasn't that attracted to him, but I thought I'd give him a chance, so we talked for a while. Then he wanted to meet up. Woah...I wasn't sure I was ready for all of that yet. So I told him I'd like to talk some more before I went to that step. I started to notice he was very self-deprecating. I'm all for dry humor and the ability to find your own flaws, but this guy was such a hater that I think he may have needed Prozac more than he needed a date. A few days later, I sent him a message saying I wasn't ready for the online dating scene, hoping he'd just go quietly away. Of course, that was a stupid move because obviously, I was still active on Match. (Lesson number one learned: don't lie. It will bite you! But come on, I was so new to this whole world of weird.) He sends me an e-mail, "In other words, I've met hotter guys than you, you fugley loser." Well, I guess he was kind of right. I just wouldn't have put it that way. Two weeks later he starts sending me one word messages "ha." CREEPY! Moving on.

Bowling Boy...
This guy had some promise. A nice job. Loved his dog. My age, but divorced. Funny. Kind of cute in pictures. We shared some interests and our phone conversations were easy. I was actually looking forward to meeting him. One of the things that happens when you start online dating is you tend to break the awkward ice by sharing "war stories" of bad first dates. He told me a doozey. He had taken this girl to a local bowling establishment that doubles as a martini bar. She had a few martinis and then started egging him on with shots. Suddenly the bowling match date turned into a drinking match as she was challenging him with shots for each time pins were left standing. After a while of heavy drinking, she disappears into the bathroom. A significantly long time goes by for a girl to be in the bathroom on a first date. A staff member comes to tell him that his date is sick in the bathroom. He proceeds to share with me that she was all sorts of sick. He told me, despite that, she pulled herself together and she insisted on driving home. (Despite his offer to call her a cab to help her out.) The next day she had the audacity to text him what a great time she had and she hoped to see him again. He said he let her know he wasn't interested, and with that story, who can blame him? In the days following him sharing this story with me, she became bowling girl and all references to our future first date were jokingly measured by how much better it would have to be than that date.

So enter week of our scheduled Friday night date. I'm having happy hour with a friend. I'm telling her about my plans and want her opinion if he's cute. So I pull up Match on my Blackberry and show her his photos. "OH NO!," she blurts out. "YOU CAN'T GO OUT WITH HIM!" Obviously alarmed, I ask why not. She tells me she had been talking to him on e-harmony and then her roommate started talking to him. (By the way, he presented himself as just recently signing up for Match and it was his first time with online dating.) Then she says all I need to hear, "He took her to [name of bowling/martini establishment]..."

No way. No way.

Your roommate is bowling girl?! This can't be happening. Kansas City is a small town, but really?!

And it gets worse (which you knew it would.)

Turns out that he was egging her on with the shots. Then she did get sick in the bathroom, but what transpired after was not the same story I was told. Let's just say he didn't offer to call her a cab, but he was more than willing to help her if she could get in her car and follow him to his house.... Then he continued to text her for weeks before eventually breaking it off because he felt bad because he slept with her!!!

Later that night when he called to chat, I said, "Maybe you shouldn't have told me about bowling girl, but I'm super glad you did." He, of course, denied that my friend's roommate was bowling girl. "That wasn't her name. No. It didn't happen that way. I told you what happen. This must be some sort of mix up."

Needless to say, I never met him. Recently he e-mailed that he was really bummed and that it was unfortunate that some mix-up kept us from meeting. I'm not bummed at all.

Remembering

2008-05-24T11:05:00.003-05:00

Today is his Nana's funeral. And for obvious reasons, I'm not going to attend her memorial service. But attending a service isn't the only way to remember someone. I can't say I fully knew Nana, but for seven years she, like all of my in-laws, was an important part of my life. They loved me and I love them. Nana was a strong woman with amazing stories to tell. Out of respect to the family who prefers to keep things private, I won't share any, but if you had the privilege of knowing Nana, you know what I'm talking about. I will say that she will be missed and his family will be in my thoughts today. Thank you Nana for teaching me how to knit and for loving me. And thank you for the role you played in his life.

laughter

2008-05-23T07:27:00.003-05:00

I snort when I laugh really hard. It just happens. That's stage one. In stage two I enter the "no breathing zone." This is where I'm laughing so hard I can't breathe. By stage three, I start to lean and fall. So if it's a really, really funny occasion, then you can almost bet I'll be silently convulsing near the floor with occasional snorts (gasps) for air. Tears are optional.

Last night I had many reasons to laugh. Surrounded by a group of friends in a zany setting. Uninhibited by social norms or rules, just having fun.

When I came home, I called my friend Molly. There are moments in this whole divorscapade (I made that word up so booyah spellchecker!) that I need to talk to my girlfriends. Even if I've just had a night to remember -- it's sometimes a little lonely in my fun. If I'm honest, at the end of the day I want to share my fun with someone.

Molly:"OhmygoshI'msuchabadfriendI'vebeenneglectingyou!!!!"

No, she really hasn't. We've all been busy.

Me: "I'm kind of sad tonight."

20 minutes later I have an invite for dinner tonight with her entire family and I am reminded that I am really not alone in any of this.

When you spend seven years of your life with someone who loves you and is there for you unconditionally, someone who you treasured having fun with, it's hard to find that strength within to know that you don't need that. You are ok alone. You don't have to share your fun with anyone else. It can be yours. You can own it.

But when you just need a little nudge toward independence...

A listening ear at 11 p.m. after a Thursday night out with the gay boys...

An invite for dinner on a Friday night...

To dump some honest feelings on someone...

It's nice to have good friends.

And Molly has the most amazing laugh you've ever heard.

Adding to Gertie's growing list of fears...

2008-05-22T12:38:00.003-05:00

Since moving back into the city, Gertie has found a laundry list of items that are terrifying. Namely:

The iron gates at my apartment

Garbage trucks

Buses

Any vehicle blasting sirens

Bikes (this is not a new fear, but she has encountered them more frequently than in her suburban life.)

Homeless people on park benches

And yesterday she discovered the frightening world of....

Famous people know me

2008-05-21T07:11:00.002-05:00

So, I've been reading her blog for a while and think she's pretty awesome. I outed myself as a fan yesterday and she wrote me back! Eek. I was very excited. So she promised me some great match.com stories, and oh boy, did she live up to her promise. Thanks, Erin!

As if that wasn't enough excitement for your average Tuesday morning, I decided to take my stalking e-mails to a new level and sent a message to this super cool author with a super cool name. I'm reading her memoir on divorce at age 29, and let me tell you, if you are in your late twenties to early thirties and going through a divorce, break-up or just a rough road, you won't regret spending time in these pages. My e-mail was something short and sort of gushy about how much I'm loving the book (haven't even finished it yet and I'm still recommending it!) and think it's cool that we have the same name. Within FIVE minutes, people, she's written me back. And. She. Called. Me. A Doll. I now have a girl crush on Stephanie.

So here's a plug for her new book which comes out on Tuesday (which is what you do for people you like.) Go buy it!

ouch

2008-05-20T08:07:00.000-05:00

Hurts. Bruises up and down my inner forearms. This, folks, is not pretty....

my inner stripper is born

2008-05-19T19:50:00.002-05:00

Marathoners take note: I have an all new respect for pole dancers. Tonight I took my first class. It was painful, humbling, sexy, invigorating and challenge. Really, what else would you want in a work out?And it was a workout. Completely clothed. Possibly not what one would imagine. Some things I learned tonight:

There is a little fear of falling in me...a healthy one.
Gravity is powerful.
My body is stronger than I thought.

Thank you government for allowing me to stimulate the economy by paying for my first four classes. (and possibly my next four?)

Now I just need to come up with my stripper name...

Wedding Crashers

2008-05-18T08:40:00.006-05:00

Life is interesting when you are newly single. Dating is new and exciting and often offers unexpected adventures...

Date night last night with Mr. D. The plan: Visit the Nelson. Drinks (Harry's Bellini..mmmm)and the Preakness. Then visit the Kemper. Followed by dinner.

If you aren't in Kansas City, you have to know that it was beautiful here last night. A perfect date night. And apparently, a perfect night for a wedding. Outside the Kemper, there was a wedding party posing for photos. It was sweet. Expected. Predictable.

At M&S Grill, I wasn't expecting to see a bride and groom behind the bar posing for photos. Who does that? I mean it makes sense if you met there or both worked there or something, but I can think of a lot more picturesque places in this city to take the wedding party. Clearly our waitress was equally perplexed and frustrated with the rowdy crowd. Mr. D. just wanted to watch the race. Luckily they cleared out in time to see Big Brown's victorious run. We are both going through divorces, so we were making snarky comments under our breath, wishing them the best of luck yada yada...

Later, slightly tipsy on my bellini (ok, I had two), we walked into the Kemper and were immediately greeted by a perky wedding planner.

Are you here for the wedding?

Me: No?
Mr. D: Yes?
Her: Laughter. So you are the wedding crashers! Well the museum is open, so have fun.
Are you guys married? (she is looking at my left hand.)
Us: Awkward laughter (we later agreed, we should have responded, no, not to each other.) No.
Her: Well, maybe you'll get some ideas.
Mr. D to me: Shall we get a drink? (We didn't.)

Later, after the art, we were leaving and we stopped again to talk to the wedding planner who was clearly gunning for our future business.

Her: So what did you think?
Me: Gushing over cake, everything looks lovely etc...
Her: Are you guys dating? (here she goes again.)
Mr. D.: Sort of.
Her to him: You seem like a lot of fun.
Me: He is.

Suddenly a guest with a digital camera comes up to the three of us and has us pose in a picture. Perky Wedding Planner says she'll be sure to tell the bride and groom that we were the crashers. (So if you are out there -- your wedding was lovely. Best wishes, really. Mean that. Take us cynical marriage nay sayers with a grain of salt. Be gentle with us. We've been through a lot.)
More chit chat and then the wedding party showed up. We were outie.

Mr D: We can't get away from these weddings!
Me: And I'm sure there will be one at Grand Street...
Mr. D. I'm leaving if there is. Taking you back and leaving.
Me: Yah, you are so over this date if there is another wedding.

Later when I asked the hostess at the restaurant if there was a wedding, she said there was a rehearsal dinner. Mr. D. took back his threat.

old friends in new places

2008-05-13T21:56:00.002-05:00

So, I heart facebook. Seriously. And I heart old friends. In the past two weeks, I've had lunch with a Jr. High best friend (and if anyone can be friends with you when you are 13, they can be friends with you when you are 30!), dinner with a Jr. High boyfriend, later best friend (who reminded me that I once sent him the lyrics to "I'll Get Over You" in a note folded like a triangle), connected with my high school boyfriend and more than five high school friends. Not to mention, countless e-mails from college friends including her. Here's why old friends in my life rule:

They knew me as me, no other person. They liked me that way.
They know goofy things about me like incidents that happened in 7th grade cooking classes involving way too much orange soda and laughter. And they still like me.
They call me Steph.
There is so much to talk about. Say the past 15 years or so...
It reminds me that I have always, always prevailed. And I have always, always surounded myself with quality people.
It reminds me that I have a diverse network of people to call friends.
History. Just good history.

3 sins = 3 miles

2008-05-12T18:57:00.003-05:00

Had leftover spaghetti for lunch - tack on 1 mile
Had ice cream cake for celebratory work milestone with coworkers - tack on 1 mile
Plan to enjoy PF Changs with girlfriend in a few - tack on 1 mile

Yes, folks, that's three miles I had to run for my three delicious indulgences today. It was tough as I've been in a 2 mile rut getting back into shape. But I have all these great friends who want to go on runs with me and if I'm going to hang, I need to be in better condition...that means I see more 3, 4 and 5 mile evening runs in my future. Gertie who is recovering on the floor with her new raw hide should be thrilled.

Inspired

2008-05-11T20:51:00.003-05:00

I had the priveledge of proctoring a test Saturday morning for 6th graders applying for this program. I'm not a teacher, so the opportunity to be in the classroom and administering a test was all new. I had a classroom of 20 kids from KC, MO. The kids were a little groggy when they first came in. But by the third test, we had all warmed up to one another. At the end of the testing, I had a chance to visit with some of them. So inspiring! They were so cute -- asking me questions, telling me about their hobbies and interests (soccer, video games, basketball, dancing...) And they thought I was a teacher - a compliment!!! I wish them all the best. The scholarship program is an amazing opportunity for these kids.

In other news, capped off a perfect Saturday in true urban girl style (took a cab and everything!!) attending this show. So awesome. Not only did she sing Easy Street (from ANNIE), but James Taylor to boot!! Popular and Love Song also had me grinning from ear to ear.

Today was Mother's Day. I found THE perfect card for my mom circa 2008. "When the going gets tough. The tough call their mommies."

Spaghetti (my mom's specialty) and apple pie (grandma's specialty) at my parents' house and I brought Gertie, my grandma and her dog. It was a circus. Surprisingly, my parents handled it in stride. I'm wondering why both moms had to cook...

Classic

2008-05-09T19:36:00.001-05:00

The first piece of mail I received at my new apartment: a bill from my divorce attorney.

Resurfacing...

2008-05-06T08:02:00.002-05:00

After a bit of a rough road. Coming out a new woman. New home, new(ish) job, new goals, new perspective and new life. I'm ready to be public with most of these things now. It's been a few months. Shortly after my last post, my husband and I separated. The divorce is now almost final. A new marathon may be on the horizon. But in the meantime, I'm focusing on some more immediate goals:

4 times weekly runs with Gertie in our new 'hood
Elliptical training at the gym
Healthy eating
Friendships
Taking care of myself
Indulging myself

Stay tuned. There will be nothing holding me back for this chapter...

Spinning kicked me hard

2008-01-22T14:39:00.000-06:00

So I don't regularly discuss my workouts anymore because I find them boring to talk about, but last night is worth a mention. I decided I needed an injection of something into my dull, somewhat erratic routine. I tagged along with a friend to attend her spinning class. Wow. New respect for this friend. This class kicked me hard.

20 minutes in, I'm standing up, cranking my pedals, wanting to die, cursing this imaginary hill and Gwen Stafani for the very real song I was supposed to be on beat with. After the song, I seriously could have been done. I would have felt great about my nice 20 minute spin, but no, I had 40 minutes left!!! I thought I wouldn't make it. Unfortunately, I lived. And I'm going back on Wednesday.

So over the writer's strike

2008-01-12T15:04:00.001-06:00

On Wednesday, I sent an e-mail out that started:

Are you feeling a serious lack of well-written television is diminishing your brain cells? Is there is nothing to discuss at the “water cooler” on Monday morning? Do you find yourselves watching more and more shows similar to the likes of “America’s Top Beautiful, Skinny, Gift-to-Men,” “Surviving a Set-Up Desert Island Scenario,” “The Hills Are Alive With the Sound of Fakeness” or “The Biggest Losers Because We Had Trainers and Hours Upon Hours to Exercise Our Rears Off” ?

I was thinking of starting a book club to counteract all the bad television that I am currently consuming and (mainly) to get together with the girls once a month and drink wine. I would like to propose the Writer’s Strike Book Club to you all....

Well, it turns out, I'm not the only one who shares this sentiment.

Two great movies. Two horrible movie watching experiences.

2008-01-09T16:05:00.000-06:00

I love going to the movies. I love the theater experience. It's the popcorn and the velvet seats and the previews. It's just fun. What makes it even better? Going to see movies you WANT to see. Good movies. Movies that make you think. What makes it awful?

Well, let's start with movie #1. Great movie (although a tad violent for my personal tastes.) But great movie. And while I like supporting local businesses, there is a theater near my house that I will not be returning to. I think our home t.v. is larger than the screen in our theater. And the curtain didn't open all the way, so the edges of the movie were playing on the curtain. This movie is hard to watch, and it's deep. It doesn't need a peanut gallery talking throughout the film. Let's just say the audience clearly had no idea what they were walking into when they saw that matinée. They should have gone to see this movie instead.

Movie #2.
Another fantastic film. We decided to see it at 11 a.m. on a Sunday. In the past, this has been a great time for us to see movies. It's not crowded, you still have your day ahead of you when you are done and it's cheaper. Apparently others have caught onto this because it was packed. Matt and I picked the top row because I like to sit so that I'm centered with the screen. (OCD much?) We scootched on to the middle of the row and I was happily enjoying my child-size popcorn snack pack. T-minus 2 minutes prior to showtime this lady sits next to me and whispers to me, "I'm going to ask you guys a favor. I have about six friends coming and we need these seats. Can you please scoot down two seats.?" Ok, she said please, but I was ticked. I picked my center of the row with care. There were still seats left down front and it's not my fault that her late friends weren't going to have primo seating. We scooted down, shooting death looks to her. Then her friends march in 5 minutes into the movie and she proceeds to dramatically wave both arms to catch their attention. Then she proceeded to laugh loudly at the parts that weren't even that funny. SO annoying. I probably wouldn't have minded if I weren't already ticked off.

I'm willing to bet neither she nor her loud, late friends knew a thing about this movie before they came. I bet they know nothing about the screenwriter or her book.

Snowy Saturday

2007-12-22T15:16:00.000-06:00

Well the great hunt for Christmas gifts is over. And we are all tucked in for a snowy Saturday afternoon here in Kansas. The Jayhawks have won and all is well.

One lucky gal

2007-12-20T10:05:00.001-06:00

We went out for happy hour with friends last night and I was reminded for the 100,000,000th time at how funny and fun my husband is. He had the entire table laughing at his stories. It's so much fun to be around a person like that, and being married to him is even better!

I told you this blog might become a random rambling....

Hummer helps?

2007-12-18T08:15:00.000-06:00

Saw a commercial for this new ad campaign last night: http://www.hummer.com/hummerjsp/home.jsp?goto_page=/world/hummer_helps.swf&goto_nav=world. Essentially, they are claiming that owners of Hummers help people during times of national disaster. Ok, I can get behind the idea that the occasional Hummer has pulled a car or three out of flood waters, or maybe even packed a school room of children into its passenger area to drive them to safety. But, to claim that Hummers are helping the planet? I'm thinking that is pretty far from the truth.

Sick

2007-12-17T13:04:00.000-06:00

Disclaimer: Now that I'm blogging again, I haven't decided whether or not this is going to be solely about running. In fact, I'm leaning toward repurposing the entire blog to random ramblings by your's trulely. Not that anyone's reading anymore, but I'm just saying...

Yesterday, Matt and I finally got around to watching Sicko, a documentary by Michael Moore. Now, I haven't completely decided if I'm always 100 percent on board with Mr. Moore's opinions, but this documentary was spot on! The interviews in Canada, London and Paris were beyond compelling. I mean if our government can provide public eduation, why not public health care? There was a gentleman from England who had been a member of Parliment. His point was if the government can fund a war, why can't it fund health care.

I highly recommend this film.

What do you say?

2007-12-05T06:24:00.000-06:00

So it's been over a year since my last post. I thought I'd sneak one in, in the off chance that anyone is reading. For the record, I'm still reading your blogs!

So, yes, I'm still running. However, I've found it easier on weekdays to get up and use our elliptical machine since it's still dark when I get up and it gets dark by the time I get home. Does anyone have any thoughts about this problem for running safety?

A lot has transpired over the course of the year. To summarize:

We got a new dog -- a puggle! Mack. So now we have Mack & Gertie.
I landed yet a new job. This one, I promise, will be the last. I'm happier than EVER and so glad to be out of an awful situation.
We moved again to a new house.
We went to Mexico again
Yours truly turned the big 3-0. Whew. But thanks to my wonderful husband who threw a fabulous surprise party for me, and my wonderful friends who helped me celebrate, it wasn't too painful.

Overall, it's been a pretty good year. Check back again, I'm going to try to post more often now.

A very happy runner's Thanksgiving to me...

2006-11-23T17:46:00.000-06:00

(And you all thought I wasn't blogging b/c I've been slacking. bwahahaha. I have been a running /work out machine lately, just not talking about it very much..too busy with new job and other distactions. )

11/23/06
Mile High United Way Turkey Trot
1196--bib number
Stephanie
2150--place overall
866--place among women
39:01--TIME!!!!

Four miles. High altitude. (Look, it's not called the Mile High United Way Turkey Trot for nothing!) MAJOR, MAJOR P.R. I'm supper stoked...and now, bring on the champagne and turkey.

Our trip to Mexico

2006-10-28T19:27:00.000-05:00

Get Your Own! | View Slideshow

Cancun or Bust

2006-10-23T17:01:00.000-05:00

Well, the jetsetting couple is off for another adventure...this time to celebrate our four year anniversary in CANCUN. I may not be doing a lot of running (Ariba, ariba!), but I'll be doing a lot of laying on the beach and drinking margaritas. So, cheers to everyone, especially those who ran in Chicago. And, I'll make a point of writing more when I return. Oh, but I start a new job, so, be patient with me. There's a lot going on. But I haven't given up on this blog yet! :) (Or running for that matter.) Pictures and any running reports will be posted upon my return.

Gertie's First Run

2006-10-02T11:37:00.000-05:00

I swear this entire blog is not suddenly going to become all about my dog. (Ok, that might be a lie.) But this proud dog mommy has to share about Gertie's first run. (After all, this is still a running blog.)

Anyhow, it was hot in Kansas City -- Indian Summer-- and so we took it easy, especially since we think poor Gertster may have spent her early months of life caged up without a lot of activity. (She has some tough spots on her elbows that indicate a lot of cage time or at least time spent on a hard surface, poor baby.)

I'm pleased to report she did very well on her first time out. We ran a little further than two miles (2.16 or something like that) at aout an 11 minute mile pace. Gertie quickly learned to stay beside me, but not too close. She happily trotted along, but I noticed around 1.5 miles, she was getting tired, so we slowed down. At one point, we have to stop and cross at a crosswalk. When we arrived on the other side of the street, I looked down and realized, I was holding a leash attached to a collar that was NOT on a dog. My heart jumped a mile, but Gertie was right there next to me, panting while she waited for me to put the collar back on her head.

And, as she usually does when we return home from any outing, her tail started wagging when we walked in the door. Gertie's favorite thing is coming home, and isn't that the best part of any run?

1 year and other randomness

2006-09-27T06:45:00.000-05:00

Sunday my one year marathon anniversary came and went with one passing thought...Oh! I ran a marathon a year ago today. That thought as I ran a piddly two miles on a treadmill in a hotel workout center because I had to miss running with Running Jayhawk due to the stupid storms in Chicago that cancelled my flight Friday night. (To my credit, that short run was followed by 15 minutes on the elliptical.)

Yes, I'm still running these days, although, for now, the shorter distances are suiting me fine. I'm finding that my speed is improving and I'm looking forward to a few fall 5Ks to test that theory out under a more crunch time setting. But don't be discouraged, long runs are still out there in the future, possibly somewhat near future (as in before 2007) I know there is a 4 mile turkey run on Thanksgiving in DENVER coming up. (Yes, I realize that is not a long distance.) And there MAY be a longer turkey run prior, if I can get myself in gear for training.

This summer has brought many unexpected changes in my life and taken me to new places. I'm very happy with my decision to hold off on long-distance training for now. It will be there later. I'm also happy with my improved fitness and health, and let's face it, the pants size I dropped.

I'm also looking forward to hearing about my friend Laura in the Chicago MARATHON! I will be reporting on her behalf if she lets me.

So fall is here and there is a lot to look forward to. Keep on running everyone!

2006-09-20T10:58:00.000-05:00

Dog Tails

2006-09-20T08:50:00.000-05:00

Thank you to all of you who responded about my new dog, Gertie. I have been waiting to tell the story of how she came to us because I wanted my blog friend, Kim at one of my favorite dog blogs: Vizslocity to tell you the story . Vizslocity is a funny name if you aren't familiar with the dog breed: Vizsla. I encourage you to go visit Kim's site and read about Gertie and Vizslas. There are tons of great dog pictures over there. By the way, Gertie is a Vizsla/Lab mix, but one of the great things about Vizsla people is they aren't too snobby about that sort of thing.

I'd like to introduce you to my future running partner...

2006-09-17T08:42:00.000-05:00

Facing it

2006-09-15T10:35:00.000-05:00

I can run 10 minute miles.
I just can.
I have to realize this.
The last three treadmill runs have been at 6.0 for 3 miles each. And I feel great.
This is life changing. I'm not sure I'm ready for it, but it's here.
Please do not expect these speeds to continue for long distance runs. Geesh, I'm not super woman.

Still Running

2006-09-07T20:21:00.000-05:00

For all you readers out there who have been wondering, is she running or traveling...make up YOUR MIND... I want to let you know I did run tonight. 3.1 miles to be exact. I didn't exactly mean to run a 5K, it just sort of happened. Here are my splits:
Mile 1: 10:48
Mile 2: 10:45
Mile 3: 11:00 (I could feel myself getting tired.)

It was a pretty hilly course, and by course I mean mile loop which I repeated three times. But I'm so spoiled by a flat local running trail that I sometimes have to force myself to run on hillier terrain. (you know, like Denver...)

We then traveled to a nearby BBQ joint to fill up on some calories. Nothing like burning 'em and then eating them right back. Although, I have lost 8 pounds. Yup. Somewhere between July and now, 8 pounds have disappeared. And the funny thing is that since I decided not to run a marathon this season, the pounds have shed even faster. I still have a little ways to go, but it sure is nice to fit into some "skinny" jeans in time for fall. (No matter what my relative says!) And actually all this speed I've been encountering lately (speed....bwahahaha) I have been attributing to my weight loss. Well, it's easier to run faster when there is less of you. Duh.

Cleveland Rocks!

2006-09-05T08:58:00.000-05:00

Matt and I went to Cleveland. And let me tell you, Cleveland Rocks! It was so much fun. We got a last minute deal on www.site59.com. We stayed here. (Great hotel with a cool ambiance. )
We ate here. And here. (Obviously different days.) We saw him here . And he was funny.
And we experienced rock ‘n roll here. The only downside was we had to ride on this.

Because this is really a running blog and not really a travel blog. (Althought lately, it seems like it...) I have to say that I did not run in Cleveland. Walked a ton. Ran nada.

But I want to add that Thursday night I ran 3 miles in 30:34. There. was.a.9:40 mile. in. the. mix. But I also want to say to my credit that it was flat. I'm really not that fast. I don't want to go setting any false expectations people!

2006-09-04T12:43:00.000-05:00

Running in and out of town

2006-08-26T17:41:00.001-05:00

Posting to you live from Denver, CO where I ran the fastest 5 miles today of my running career...10 min miles for.... not one, not two, not FOUR but FIVE miles. Oh yah. Thanks to my speedy sister in law who drug my ass all over Denver's most beautiful park system. It was do or be left. And I'm not one to be left behind with a Garmin that was not cooperating. So I ran. One foot in front of the other for five miles. The last three blocks my sister in law who ran the 10K Boulder Boulder in oh, 58 minutes, decided she needed to kick it in gear. Luckily I could see the street so I didn't mind being left behind. Altitude Schmaltitude is what I have to say about that.

This is not the first out of town running experience for me lately. Two weekends ago in Eureka Springs I suffered through a MUCH slower 3 miles where I spent a mile running alongside a tour trolley. I could not go fast enough to pass it and it was going too slow to pass me. So I became part of the tour and obstructed the view of Eurkea Springs for all of the retirees on board. Fun times. Oh, and did I mention the extreme hung-over condition and heat in which I ran? For those who don't know, Eureka Springs is nestled in the Ozark Mountains in Arkansas. Read: Not flat. I wanted to puke. But sorry, Barb, I didn't.

Then last weekend I ran 6 miles on the treadmill. (I mean with all of this scenic out of town running, why allow myself anything less than a good treadmill run...you know?) The treadmill was fine until the last .75 miles where I some how managed to push the "cool down" button. For those of you who don't know, cool down means go slower. And when you are trying to run 6 miles, the last thing you need is to slow down to a pace of 4.3. So I spent that last .75 fighting with the treadmill. I SAID 5.4!!! You should have seen the steam pouring out of my ears.

And this concludes my post in which I update you on all the exciting running events in my life. You know, I'm really not quite sure what race I'm running for these days. And I'm still fighting my hip. But you know what? When I do run, it's fun and when I don't I cross train. And I'm just fine with that for now. Until next time.

Running in and out of town

2006-08-26T17:41:00.000-05:00

Where oh where...

2006-08-07T12:36:00.000-05:00

Have I been? Well, let me update you. In my last post, I shared some rather upseting news. Aside from the pysical pain and healing which I have experienced over the past 12 days, I have also had to deal with the emotional pain of saying goodbye to my precious Tally. For you dog people (and thanks for all the well-wishes), I know you understand and can imagine how painful this was.

So, let's just say, running was put on the back burner for a little R &R. And where does this leave me? Well, for a multitude of reasons, I have decided to not run the Kansas City Marathon. I know a lot of you were cheering virtually for a fabulous rematch vs. the old pukey puke marathon. And I hate to let people down, but my first priority has to be my own health and well-being. I'm still really struggling with my hip flexor pain and I'm not sure continuing with marathon miles is in my best interest. Because to be honest, I'm not here to prove anything, I'm really just hear to set personal bests and have a great time. I love running. (most days.) And I want to be able to continue running through the fall (my favorite running season) and the winter and so on. There may be a rematch in years to come, or heck, I may forgo the whole Kansas City thing and set my sights on a bigger marathon. We'll see.

That said, I'm still going to try to run the half. Before my little R &R break, I was up to 14 miles. And even though I didn't post it, a week ago Sunday I ran 4 and elipical trained 3 miles due to the hip pain and the arm pain (back then, I was still in a lot of pain and the blood flow to the wounds did not help.) This past weekend no miles were run due to a trip to Omaha with Matt. And you know what? I didn't even care. It was great. I've done minimal cross training and one other 3 mile run but other than that, I've been taking it easy. This week, I return to a revised and modified training schedule to keep me in shape in order to run the half--as long as my hip flexor safely holds out.

I hope you will stick around because despite this recent step back in training, the title of my blog remains "Onward Bound."

Broken

2006-07-27T07:42:00.000-05:00

Yesterday we had to make the most painful decision ever. Our beloved Tally dog bit me very badly on the arm. Her aggressive behavior has become a scary pattern in the past year and after stitches, dealing with animal control and many phone calls to pet specialists, breed association people and a very kind breed rescue person, we decided that it is in the best interest for both Tally and us to allow the breed rescue find her a new home with a family that is well-trained with aggressive dogs in her breed. My arm is extremely painful but my heart hurts even more. Not sure when I'll run next. All work-outs and running has been scrapped this week and replaced with many tears and Advil for the arm pain. Nothing I can really do about the heart pain. Only time will heal that. Right now she is at our vet for her 10 days of Rabies quarantine, but we will not go pick her up because that will only delay the healing and make it worse if we see her. We will have the kind rescue people take her then.

For now, it just hurts and I feel a little broken.

Sure you're a little overweight...

2006-07-24T07:41:00.000-05:00

Yes, these are words I actually heard come from a family member's mouth. This same family member also told me that what works for him/her is walking 1.5 miles a day and they suggested I might benefit from it. I was devastated. I love this person dearly and I can't believe they see me this way. This was also said to me on the phone after I ran 14 miles and so I felt even worse. How could I work so hard and still be seen as "a little overweight?" Isn't it obvious by looking at me that I am hard-working runner? I know I'm not as thin as I once was, but is it really that bad? Maybe I do need to shed some pounds. Geez, I now feel awful. There are certain people who I expect to be critical of my weight, but this was not one of those people, which made the comments even worse. And no, the comment was not said because I asked. It was actually something that was said in reference to something else.

The reason I'm sharing is not to get pity comments from you because most of you haven't seen me in real life anyway. It's just to vent and in hopes that maybe someone else has had the awful feeling that their hard, hard work is not paying off in terms of their exterior appearance. And not that it is the sole meaning in life, but it is had when you run and run and run and then you hear something like that. Ok, enough. Happy posts in the future.

Reunions

2006-07-23T11:28:00.000-05:00

Friday night I had the honor of attending a 10 year high school reunion for a class I attended grades 7-9 with. I'm pleased to report that I was immediately carded for my beer. (Hoorah, anything to counteract the Am-I-Really-this-Old? feeling.) I'm also pleased to report that it was fun and I'm glad I went. Those Jr. High years have such an influence on who you end up being as an adult and at the same time, the person you were then, is only a snapshot of the entire person you will become. One of the highlights was sharing with a good friend about my marathon last year. I think I've mentioned it before, but I did not exactly hold up a repuation as a stellar athlete during my teen years. In fact, I ran track in 7th and 8th grade and came in dead last every single time in my event (the 400.) But you know what? It never stopped me. Nope. Never. Meet after meet, I always came back for more. And so, I think that part of me still holds up today.

On Saturday, my cousin and I drove my grandma to Ozark, Missouri to see my uncle who has been sick. 3 hours each way made for a long day. But the benefits of seeing family and spending time with my grandma exceeded the burden of the long drive. Unfortunately, I also had to return home to a very warm house because our A.C. went out. The part won't be ready until Monday, so we are roughing it, so to speak. It's not that bad. Ok, it's bad. But it could be worse. It could have been last week.

And this morning, I had a reunion of another sort. As part of my 14 mile run, I included one of the hills from my marathon. In fact, I believe it's actually the biggest hill. For those in K.C. it's the hill that takes you from Ward Parkway and the Plaza, up Summit Road to Loose Park. I remember this hill particularly from last year. There was a lady from Alaska who I met on this hill and at the top of the hill, my friend Laura was waiting for me. Well today, there were no other runners or friends to cheer me on. So pretty much it was just me and monster climb. And I'm pleased to report that the hill and I became pretty good friends, all considering. It was the last 5 miles that really pained me for some reason today. I was struggling and walking a lot. Don't know what the deal was, but I hope this pattern doesn't continue because me and my marathon hills aren't done training yet. I plan to keep incorporating much of the course into my training.

Total Time: 2:59:30
Average 12:49/ miles which tells me there was way too much walking going on.

It had to be done

2006-07-19T07:27:00.000-05:00

Five miles. On the treadmill. Again. Oh boy, here we go.

I've been having a rough go of it lately. Nothing major, just some stress and things, but I knew the treadmill was waiting for me after work. So I ponied up and paid my $5 to visit the gym (I'm on the MWFSun. plan which when it is not 100 degrees outside works out great, but on days when I need to visit to run, I just pay.) I guess a few other people had my idea that it was too hot to run outside. There wasn't a treadmill. I almost flipped. And then I waited. Luckily, one of the "good" treadmills opened up. (You know how it is, everyone has that one type of treadmill that works better for them.) Except there was another girl waiting and she was closer. Damn, I thought. But then she looked at me and motioned for me to take it. Me? I batted my eyelashes. Well, shucks. There are good people out there. You were here first, she said and I smiled and graciously thanked her.

Unfortuantely, even though I got the "good" treadmill, I did not luck out on the T.V. viewing selection. It was either Fox News or BET music videos. I went with the music videos because I like me some Sierra every now and then...

Mile 1: time usually flies by. Pace: 5.2 or 11:20. Incline: .5 (remained for entire run b/c I read in Runner's World, that .5 is actually a more natural, safe running incline.)

Mile 2: time slows down, the dreaded realization that you are going to be on the machine for a while. Pace: 11:20

Mile 3: missing my Garmin. Hate the electronic read-out on treadmill. Covered with towel, but then I needed the towel. Pace: 11:06. (Hey, switch it up a bit, keep it fresh, you know?)

Mile 4: Oh how I hate people who can leave their treadmills now. Pace: 11:06

Mile 5: Let's just get this over with. Pace: 10:40 for about .25 then back to 11:06. Who was I kidding?

And there you have it. I was done. (and hungry, ravishing, actually. Go figure.) What this means is that on Thursday, I only have to run 4. Yay.

Hot

2006-07-18T07:39:00.000-05:00

Several bloggers have been posting lately about the HEAT WAVE in the midwest. Well sign me up for the post train because I'm hopping on board. It's frickin' hot. Too hot. Really hot. It's (are you ready for this?) treadmill hot.

So what have I been up to? Here's the skinny:
-Ran 8 miles Saturday morning. Not a bad run considering the previously mentioned HEAT. Also, I was totally inspired by our exciting mini-RBF meet breakfast for later that morning. As a lone runner, there is nothing as exciting as the thought of being able to dish about your run after your run with other runners.
-Breakfast was fun. I finally got to meet my puke bud, Barb, who was fabulous. KT and I rode together and evidently we both needed some therapy because the drive turned into a much needed rant session for both of us.
-Yesterday for a cross training day, I decided to take a spin on the old excersise bike. Wow, that was harder than I thought. 30 minutes later, I bailed to the elliptical machine to finish up my work out with 25 more minutes.
-This morning, I intended to get up early and run, but it was dark. For some reason, I thought it would be lighter at 5:15? Anyhow, that's my excuse, but don't worry. The treadmill will be waiting for me after work.

You can do it --Put your back into it

2006-07-09T17:12:00.000-05:00

For some reason, lately I can only seem to reference lame song lyrics when referring to running-related aches and pains. Anyhow, lots to report, so let's back up to our Nation's birthday.

Went out for a four mile run. Was recognized while running by a group of bikers from my Jr. High days. (yah, I know.) Anyhow, it turns out the girl who recognized me has actually been looking for me. (I'm hard to find? ) The class I went to Jr. High (7-9th grade) with wants me to join them for the class 10 year high school reunion. That is so nice of them. I really hate to tell them I'm a totally different person, but perhaps I'm not the only one who has changed. So, I may go. There are some people I'd love to connect with, just to see what they are up to.

Anyhow, after that, my back, hips legs, everything started hurting. Actually, ever since I hurt my hip, everything has been a little off. But in the spirit of trying not to obsess about every little pain, I've been rather quiet about it. (Unless you are Matt, then you have to hear me whine about it all the time...poor Matt.)

SO, I took the rest of the week off. I thought a little R & R would be helpful. I don't think back pain is really something to ignore, even strange jump all over the place back pain like mine. The rest wasn't really helping the pain, so you can imagine the nerves I had when I thought about trying to run 12 miles.

BUT, on Friday, Matt and I went out and purchased my first Garmin!!! I can't tell you how happy I am. I feel like I'm finally in the group now b/c I can track splits, time and distance. It really will have a great impact on my training.

With the new purchase, I had to run, of course, but I was still nervous. So this morning I took off. My thought was, I'll take it one mile at a time. I'm not gonna lie, there was pain, but it wasn't that bad. So, I kept running and running and running and before I knew it, I was at 10 miles on the home stretch. I'm stoked that I finished a scheduled run. I am hurting pretty bad now and to make matters worse, I have a bad, bad skin abrasion on my back b/c it was raining and my running pack rubbed it raw. (ouch!) I don't know what hurts worse. :) But you know what? I don't care right now. I can eliptical or whatever until I figure this out and I'm hoping it will just go away? Anyhow, without further ado, I present to you stats from a training run for the first time EVER on this site.
Total time: 2:26:22
Avg: 12:06 mile
1: 11:21
2: 12:08
3: 11:17
4:11:18
5: 12:47
6: 12:29
7: 12:56 --lots of walking and eating of sports beans
8: 11:43: --rain started falling harder
9: 12:09
10: 12:12 --oh my gosh, I will make it!
11: 12:11
12: 12:02--Horrah!

Treadmill Randomness

2006-07-03T08:05:00.000-05:00

*Every eye exam should be taken on a treadmill during a 6 mile run. Amazingly, I can't read the little lines of letters on the chart at the eye doctor's office. But, when I'm trying to "keep my mind off time and miles,"I can read the minutes AND the tiny second count-down on the hanging digital clock at 24-hour Fitness.
*If you hit the stop button, even on accident, your work-out will stop and you will have to start over.
*Cold water that stays chilled in your water bottle and sitting in the holder on the treadmill is so much more refreshing than hot water from your water pack.
*Celebrity news is good for about 3 miles, then it just gets on your nerves.
*An hour and 15 minutes is a LONG time to run on a treadmill.

Two runs one post

2006-07-01T10:26:00.000-05:00

It's all about efficiency, you know? I logged 8 miles this work week and interestingly while both of my 4 mile runs were done on a treadmill (sorry, but it's been a heatwave this week and I'm a weenie), they were totally different beasts.
Wednesday: First half mile, ok. Mile .5-4. I wanted to die. Seriously. I thought I would never survive. I wanted to stop every minute. To compromise I slowed the treadmill down from 5.4 (11.06 minute miles) to 5.2 (11:30) And even then, I had to take a walking break at mile 2. I don't know what happened there, but it was not pretty.

Friday: Miles 0-4, awesome. Started out at 5.4, up to 5.6 ended at 5.8!

It just goes to show you that there are factors beyond temperature, setting, surface and speed that factor into our runs. I don't know what those variables were on Wednesday for me, I can only guess. But, I do know that I'm hoping for more Fridays than Wednesdays in my future. A six miler is on the books for Sunday.

Mental War

2006-06-25T15:42:00.000-05:00

For those who like to read the endings of books first, I'll spare you the scroll down: I ran my scheduled 10 miles.

For the rest of you, the story goes like this: Yesterday I prepared mentally and physically for my run today. I went to bed early (10:30) and woke up early (6:30). I already knew I was going to have a hard time getting out there b/c I had some anxiety dreams about running. But I dressed and ate my breakfast bar and drank my water. I also knew I was going to have a hard time because let's just say I wasn't feeling good, at all. (Ladies, get my drift here.) In fact, things got so bad, I decided to go back and lay down for a while. After checking the weather forecast (and watching it religiously on Saturday), I knew I had a little time to play with. The weather was unseasonably cool today, but thunderstorms were predicted around noon. I had to get out there before noon. I had to. But, things were pretty bad and so I stayed in bed.

The following conversation between "good runner Stephanie" and "bad runner PMS devil Stephanie" took place in my head:
-You must get up.
-Don't get up, you won't make it in this condition even if you try.
-If you don't get up now, it will start storming and then you never will get your run in today.
-You could always run 10 miles on the treadmill later.
-You hate the treadmill.
-You must get up.
-You could always run 10 miles after work tomorrow. You could even do the elliptical today and then run tomorrow.
-You can't do that, it will throw off your schedule. And really, who are you kidding? You'd never run 10 miles after work. You must get up.
-You could always skip it all together. I mean, really, you say you aren't officially training for anything. Why would you kill yourself.
-Screw it, you are going back to sleep.

I woke up at 10. Moped around, drank my coffee with soy milk and I was still feeling pretty bad. Since I was sure it was too late to head out before the storms, Matt and I went to lunch. (Pizza of all things) I was horrible company. I was a mess. I had skipped a 10 mile run. This was the end of the world. I needed a resolution, but what would I do? Ok, get a grip Stephanie (good runner Stephanie reappeared) It's only 11 a.m., there is still plenty of time to run. It's not super hot today, and look, it's not raining. It's sunny.

Ok, GRS was right. I needed to stop obbsessing and get out there. Unfortunately, I had a belly full of pizza, salad and soy coffee. This was not exactly the pre-long run diet I am used to. So I waited until 12:45 (worrying every second it would start raining) and then geared up and started running. Armed with my cell phone and instructions to Matt to come get me if it started storming (poor guy), I took off.

A few highlights included:
Running with a nice young doctor training for the half. We stuck together 2 miles and then I decided her pace was too fast for 10, so I let her go on ahead.
Seeing an Airedale Terrier like mine.
Trying new sports beans (fruit punch--yum)
Being done with the whole thing.

Are you happy now, GRS?! Grrr.

Catch-Up

2006-06-24T14:33:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I played catch-up at the gym. I ran three miles as catch-up from Thursday night where I skipped three miles (resting hip ONE more day) ....I'll never make the extra 2 miles skipped on Tuesday, but I think at this point, that's ok. Tomorrow I'm going out for 10. I purchased a pack of sports beans, because after the marathon, I'll never gu again. (sorry, gu fans.) In other news I'm going to have to eat red meat tonight because I've been invited to a dinner where this is being served. I NEVER eat red meat, but this cannot be avoided, so we'll see how it goes down the night before a "big" run.

Please tell me my hip is lying...

2006-06-21T07:06:00.000-05:00

So Monday night, I went to the gym and I was on the elliptical--the one without the moving handles that lets you crank up the incline. It has this handy little digital read out that shows with little glowing green dots which muscles you are working as you crank it up. So, being the overachiever that I am, I cranked. Oh, nice, I'm working my quads. Not good enough. Crank. Oh still working my quads, ok. Crank. Crank. Finally. My hamstring, nice, but not good enough. Crank. Crank. Crank. YAY! All lights are now lit up and I am also working my calves. The stride was pretty long to make it all the way up the incline each step with my short legs, but I pushed myself through a somewhat challenging work-out and left feeling great. No biggie.

Tuesday morning, I woke up, rolled out of bed and stepped. Oh.my.gosh. I could not put any weight on my left leg because up around my hip, but in the front, so like where upper quad meets hip area? (description is v. vague as this is kind of an odd place) hurt. YEOWEE. I limped around the bedroom. It actually kind of felt like if I could just pop it somehow (I know, gross, eh?) it would feel better. I just couldn't figure out how to do that. (Why is it whenever I'm at work or in a social setting and I only have to stand or move differently to sound like a bowl of rice crispies, but when I'm in my bedroom trying to alleviate some pain, I can't get anything to pop?!) I tried a few different stretches, but nothing seemed to really stretch that area. So, I got ready. As I moved around yesterday, the pain went away. It wasn't until late afternoon when I had been sitting for a long period of time and I stood up that I experienced a lesser degree of the pain.

By the time I left to go home, I was facing a dilemma. To run or not to run. Last year, it would have been an easy choice: don't run. I was playing it REALLY safe so I wouldn't be injured for my marathon. (bwahahahahaha, that worked well.) But this year my goal (for whatever I am or am not training for) is to train completely different. More cross-training and more aggressive with my runs. (Not being afraid to push myself as opposed to backing off to prevent injury) I figure that if I get injured, it's no big thing because I'm not training for anything, right? (I know, weird mental game, but stick with me, ok?)

So I made a compromise. I would run two miles instead of four and see how it felt and I could either skip the other two miles or catch-up as part of my cardio cross-training at the gym on Wednesday.

I started slow and at first, the hip area (whatever it is, I'm just calling it my hip b/c that's easier than a lengthy description each time) was a little tender. But as I ran, it went away and I finished nicely. No pain at all last night up until bedtime.

Then, this morning? Repeat of yesterday, but pain times two. Not good. I'm not panicked yet. There is no need to be. If I'm injured, oh well. It won't be the end of my running, but I may have to rethink some fall activities. And maybe it's just a pulled tendon or something. We'll see. Anyhow, the gym is still on for tonight. I may or may not run that extra two miles.

I think the point is that I'm just not putting the pressure on myself like last year. It about killed me obsessing about every little ache, pain, decision etc... I'm a runner and injuries are going to happen. This may or may not be one, but whatever the case, I'm not done running. Stay tuned...

No shame

2006-06-19T07:29:00.000-05:00

It's official. I have no shame. I forced KT into committing a crime at Quick Trip. Are you ready? We stole tap water. Yes, and coffee cups to drink it out of. Actually, it didn't have to go down so dramatically. Thinking back, perhaps I didn't make the best choices in planning for the 6 mile run. Review:
1. After a week of hot weather and hot, muggy weather predicted for Saturday morning, I still decided that sleep was important in preparation for my party (not the run, of course), therefore start time was set at 9 a.m.
2. The start time would not have been so bad, but I also decided that due to the missing water bottle holder, I would forgo bringing fluids with me.
3. Despite lack of fluids, I did not bring any cash with me to purchase emergency hydration supplies if needed

These factors combined resulted in one extremely desparate runner who would do anything for water after mile 4. Ok, maybe not anything, but walking into QT, taking a coffee cup, filling with water and chugging? Didn't phase me.

I feel so bad, dragging KT into my crime.

Anyhow, the rest of the run was fine, except it was really, really hard for some reason. Maybe it was the heat? I don't know. All I know is that I have a lot to prove to myself during my 10 mile run next weekend.

KT, hope my criminal ways won't deter you from future runs! I also broke down and purchased a water bottle holder on Saturday because I'm the kind of gal who learns from her mistakes. (Sometimes)
P.S. Barb, I think we had similar run weeks.

Going to my head

2006-06-16T07:34:00.000-05:00

I'm not exactly off to a good start, people. But I don't think it's anything I can't recover from. It all started Tuesday at lunch when I got my hair cut. I LOVE getting my hair cut. And because it looked so great, I just could not fathom wasting such a great hair day by throwing it back and getting all sweaty with it. I know I may have lost some readers with that last statement. (What? You skipped a run b/c you got your hair cut? What kind of runner are you?) But seriously, people, it looked really good. And so we went to happy hour with a friend. A well-spent good hair day venture in my book.

Like Barb, I had the best intentions of making up for lost miles on Wednesday, but alas, that did not happen. So LAST night after two seemingly long days away, I laced up and headed out. Oh, it was hot. And my water bottle holder is MIA since the move. And it hurt. And did I mention it was hot? I'm actually blaming Nytro in part for the heat. She told us her bangs were cute, but she did not tell us that they make your HEAD HOTTER thank hell when you run. Anyhow, thanks for the beauty tip Nytro, but you need to put warnings on your hair tips specific to runners: Bangs will be hot and they will drip sweat into your eyes.

And, for some reason after only 4 miles, I'm actually sore today, which is strange, but like Dice said, the wind was really blowing.

Because my priorities are really in order, I plan on running my 6 mile long run Saturday with KT in order that I may party on down with my friend Molly who is celebrating her 30th Birthday Saturday night. Happy Birthday, Miss Molly!

Glutton for Punishment or Just Crazy?

2006-06-12T07:14:00.000-05:00

So Saturday before "long" run Sunday, I just happened to be visiting www.kcmarathon.org. And just happened to print last year's training schedule. And then I just happened to grab a calendar and back it up to what it would be with this year's date in mind. And then I just happened to compare my own running mileage with that of the schedule and I just (you guesssed it) happened to be right on track. And then I noted that in order to stay on track, I would need to run 8 miles for my long run on Sunday. (Schedule says Saturday, but that is not a problem) I had planned on running 6, but then I just (fill in the blanks here) happened to run 8? Hmmm... Oh, and I also just happened to take a little side track from my fairly flat running trail to treck up a serious hill during mile 4 because, K.C. isn't flat, you know. But I'm not training for anything, am I?

In other news, I also sat on my porch for 20 minutes post-run waiting for Matt to return from his bike ride, thinking I was locked out, but really my hand was just too sweaty to open the door -- dur. Oh well, I was just, uh, enjoying the quietness of my new neighborhood on a Sunday morning. Yah, that's it.

Go RBF GO!

2006-06-04T15:48:00.000-05:00

And they are off...
the marathoners we've been virtually following for many months.
A hats off to KT, A. Maria, & Kit Kat, all three of whom I've had the opportunity to meet in real life. Also to Nic and the others who are running today in San Diego and beyond. I love this stuff!

I want to also give a special congrats to KT who, like me, trained solo for her first marathon. I think it takes an extra special runner to go out and conquer her goal with no training team whatsoever. (it's very leo of her....)

New running route

2006-06-01T11:43:00.000-05:00

The best (ok, not the best, but one of the best) parts of moving to a new house is checking out your new running route. I took two days off this week (big event at work on Wednesday and well, quite frankly, I needed the time after the move etc...), so this morning, I hit the road. It was amazing.

Also, while my fitness routine has been a little lax due to the move, I don't want anyone to think I've totally slacked off. I did go to the gym a few times, especially since our shower wasn't working when we first moved in last weekend. It's actually a pretty motivating factor: if I go work out, I can shower. :) But not as good as Nytro's sandwiches...(even though my weakness would have to be ham and cheese as opposed to peanut butter.)

Love new house, now just need to find time to run

2006-05-28T21:21:00.000-05:00

If only I could find where I packed my running shoes...

Moving sucks

2006-05-23T08:21:00.000-05:00

I know I'm supposed to be positive about the new house etc.. but I just have to rant: Moving Sucks. I'll return to our normally scheduled programing post-move.

A marketing mishap

2006-05-18T09:06:00.000-05:00

I don't run with money. Ok, I rarely run with money, unless I'm running an incredibly long distance alone and I think I might need some emergency cash. So, Tuesday during my 3-mile run, I had the unfortunate luck to run by three young children selling Kool-Aid. I saw them in the distance. And I started to go through what I would say to them when I passed. I was obviously in their target market. I was tired, hot and thirsty. And, I was on foot. But what I lacked was money. Oh, Kool-Aid sounded good too. I love that cherry-flavored stuff. It reminds me of summers at Vacation Bible School --the only time a year I was allowed to drink Kool-Aid and eat cheap lemon cookies. It was free then, but not on Tuesday.

So as I passed, I prayed for a car to drive up and give them business so I could run by unnoticed. But, nope. "Miss...do you want some Kool-Aid?!" Oh, poor kids, they were so cute too. They could see it in my eyes. Yes, I wanted the sugary, additive-laden water. I could see it in their eyes, "Oh, she's a buyer!" And then the bubble burst. "Sorry guys, I don't have any money." (I could see them thinking, "liar, grown-ups always have money that they don't give to kids.") So I turned back around and shouted, "I don't carry money when I run, but thank you and good luck." Ok, I'm a dork. But, really, it was a good idea for those kids to attempt sell their product to a hot, thirsty runner like myself, but what I lacked was the resources to purchase it. And that was a marketing mishap. (Tonight, I think I'll bring 50 cents, just in case they are back, and so that would be an example of a succesful ongoing marketing campaign. I wonder if they need P.R.?)

My New Lucky Number:23

2006-05-14T18:56:00.000-05:00

Ok a few things. I actually technically did set a P.R. if we are starting my P.R. for 5Ks with my last 5K back in October. AND I placed 23 out of100 women in my age group...the top quarter. Mind you, it was a small race with a lot of walkers, but I feel pretty good about myself in this moment.
23 Last Name Stephanie Overland Park KS 28 32:25 10:28

Not a P.R., but at least I didn't register as a dude

2006-05-14T09:54:00.000-05:00

Clock time: 32:20
Final watch time: I didn't stop it until I was well through the finish shoot, so it is not accurate:32:37
Splits: 9:48; 10:01; 12:20 (Not totally accurate b/c I didn't stop watch until I was through the shoot.)
Regardless, it was a pleasant run, quite hilly. Oh, and rest assured there was no way to register as a guy b/c it was a woman's race only. I didn't win the Kate Spade handbag door prize, darn it!